fatty
yesterday a secretary friend i see about once or twice a year visited me in my office. she came bearing gifts and a quizzical expression.
her: have you gained weight?
me: [stunned silence]
her: [nervous chuckle] you look bigger than the last time i saw you!
me: oh yeah, sure, i'm always gaining weight [nonchalant hand gesture].
i could have cried. my coworkers were disappointed that i didn't smack her for her rudeness.