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infatuation

this is utterly stupid, but i think i kind of want someone at work to have a crush on me. maybe i've spent too much time on trueofficeconfessions.com where people are always talking about secret crushes. who knew the workplace was such a hotbed of emotion? (oh wait, i did know that.) it might be because i've watched my assistant go through a very high-school-type infatuation.

i know it's hypocritical because i totally panic over the possibility of ulterior motives (you know, like sex) and i tend to get all sad when i think that someone won't just be a friend, goddammit, but today i just like the idea of an innocent little crush. maybe i'm just tired of wasting my sassy wit on gay men, i don't know. i don't need eye candy at work and i don't necessarily want to be anyone's eye candy, but when i'm feeling miserable at work, i'd like to know that someone might be blushing and stammering and looking forward to a two-minute chat with me.

as far as ego boosts go, it's not perfect -- and no, i don't need the approval of men to validate me -- but really, something, anything even remotely smile-inducing at work has got to be worth something.

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