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littlest girl

since nola's doctor's appointment last week, i've been talking to people a little bit about nola's size.

i don't care how big nola is, where on the charts she falls. all i care about is that she is happy and healthy. as long as she doesn't have the dreaded "failure to thrive" label slapped on her, i'm perfectly content. i can see why the doctor is concerned (her weight did take a dive on the charts), but i also live with the child and see that ever since she learned to crawl, she has been racing around at three hundred miles an hour.

so far i've found myself thinking about three different opinions.

one: "at least you won't have to buy new clothes very often -- she'll fit in the same ones for a really long time!" very prosaic, very practical. i liked that.

two: "guys like short girls. and short girls can wear the cutest shoes -- the best ones tend to have three-inch heels, and tall girls can't always wear those." only a tall girl would tell me such nonsense. rock those heels, tall girls. don't be ashamed of your height. as for guys liking short girls, why should i care about that? what if my short girl doesn't like guys?

three: (said with some heat) "those charts are for average american kids, right? they don't take into account kids who are three-quarters' asian!" this bothered me a little bit. what is the average american kid? am i to assume that the people behind these charts only measured white kids? (if so, why is kaiser using a chart of whiteness to measure children in a not-so-white area?) and here's a thought: should i move to a land of three-quarter asianness so that my children will appear tall? this is where we live. it's a melting pot. southern california is a place of all races, all sizes. to me, this is "average america" and we are what we are. my children will go to school with and be friends with kids of all colors, and they may be bigger or smaller than them. whatever. do i want nola saying, "i don't fall where i should on that chart because the chart-makers didn't measure people LIKE ME"? why make excuses?

when i bring up nola's size, it's partially because i think it's kind of hilarious. yes, my daughter is still solidly in 6-9 month clothing at almost 13 months. yes, i can still wear her without pain in the baby bjorn (i don't think i lasted even a month with that thing with paul). she's a wee thing and absolutely adorable. i'm not looking for comfort. if something is seriously wrong, then please, i might like some comfort then. but now? i don't need someone patting my hand and uttering soothing shit because she's little.

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